She may be one of the most acclaimed actors of her generation, but even Shefali Shah is not safe from impostor syndrome. Ahead of the release of Delhi Crime season 3, the actor spoke to Hindustan Times about returning as supercop Vartika Chaturvedi, and why she is ‘terrified’ of performing.

‘Every time, I feel it’s a fluke’

For Delhi Crime, Shefali has won countless awards, including Best Actress at the Asian Academy Creative Awards five years ago. One would assume that getting into Vartika’s skin would be easy for her by now. She disagrees, “Every time I feel this is a fluke. It’s like an impostor syndrome. I actually have this thing that when he (the director) says action, I will just stand there like I don’t understand, like he is talking French or something.”

‘I don’t know if I know the art’

That’s quite a telling revelation from an acclaimed actor. Shefali clarifies that the terror and self-doubt are not limited to Delhi Crime, but persist with all her roles and acting projects. “I am terrified, and I am not fishing for compliments. Not just for Vartika but in general, I am terrified, and it works for me. With every project, I feel last time ho gaya, but I don’t know whether I know the art of it. I don’t know whether I know how to do this. What works is that the instinct is alive, and it hasn’t become a craft. And it’s like doing it all over again,” she says.

Yet, the actor says that the anxiety and nervous energy work for her. She has a system without having one. Shefali explains, “The way I work is spontaneous, and from the heart. It’s not like I don’t use my brain, but I don’t have an instruction manual for becoming Vartika or what I should do in this particular scene. The day I feel I know it; I should go home.”

About Delhi Crime season 3

Delhi Crime season 3 also stars Rasika Dugal, Rajesh Tailang, Sayani Gupta, Mita Vashisht, Anshumaan Pushkar, and Kelly Dorji. The season also introduces Huma Qureshi as the new antagonist, a woman running a human trafficking ring. Directed by Tanuj Chopra, the popular show returns to Netflix on 13 November.